It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's just me having a fat day

I meant to do laundry this weekend. I brought everything down sorted it into piles and somehow got distracted by the kitchen that couldn't keep itself clean. So my wonderful husband said he'd help and do several loads of laundry! How sweet, considering he was sick most of the weekend. Secretly I think he was feeling useless and needed something productive to make him feel like he contributed. But either way, it helped out a lot. Then I remembered why I don't let him do laundry. Everything goes into one load on warm and EVERYTHING goes into the dryer. Not to mention that his folding skills leave something to be desired. I also discovered that of the three loads he did, almost all of it were his clothes. Oh I had a few select items thrown in for good measure, but were any of the pants that actually still fit washed? Nope, how about the three bras that still fit? Nah, and forget anything else appropriate to wear to work. Hence today I am wearing a parachute. I was able to find in the far recesses of my closet, a pair of cargo pants that sadly resemble parachute material. I swish when I walk, I have strings with no purpose hanging from my legs and way too many zippered pockets to be absolutely necessary. Not to mention that nothing looks good with them. Good thing no one at work is really worth impressing. I could come in wearing a garbage bag and they'd just be happy to see me on a Monday.